The Oracle of Balaam

Lately I've been pondering the story of the prophet Balaam quite a lot. It resonates with me because I feel like I know Balaam's position here: called on by the enemies of Israel to voice opposition and lay on a curse, all he can do is bless. One gets the impression that he doesn't really have a dog in the upcoming fight; he goes his way and apparently never becomes part of either side in the war for Moab. Still, he knows the hand of God when he sees it and can't help but say so. It's not politic, not lucrative, not comforting; reading the story you feel like Balaam would happily lie to Balak if he could figure out how to make his mouth form the words; but the Power behind Israel will not be denied.

Did Balaam look at the armies of Israel merely with awe, or did he also feel some envy? Did he wish he were blessed with the same responsibilities, the same hope?